The Physical Symptoms of Grief
Posted by: Erin Ward in Grief Articles | July 5, 2021
If you've recently experienced the passing of a beloved family member, friend, or animal companion; you're well aware of the power grief has over your quality of life. In truth, nothing is more devastating to our physical well-being and psychological/emotional equilibrium than the death of a loved one. So much so, Larry Malerba, a Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine (DO), argues it's very likely the most common 'natural' cause of chronic illness is unresolved grief.
What then is unresolved grief? While there is no clear timetable for the grief experience, unresolved grief is used to describe a grief experience which takes longer than what is common for a person's social or cultural background. In addition, Dr. Malerba tells his audience this unprocessed grief is commonly a source of anxiety, irritability, depression, other emotional disturbances, and even mania and psychosis.
Certainly, anyone with unresolved grief has trouble taking care of daily responsibilities, and not just because of the emotional and mental effects of bereavement (such as disorientation, and a painful lack of capacity to initiate and maintain organized patterns of activity (Source: Maurice Lamm). Often this inability is the direct result of the discomforts of the physical effects of grief he or she is experiencing. But your grief doesn't need to be unresolved to bring with it a set of physical symptoms; anyone mourning the death of a loved one can manifest them at any stage of the grieving process.
The Most Common Physical Symptoms of Grief
In the opening to The Atlantic's article Understanding How Grief Weakens the Body, contributor Cari Romm noted the close linguistic connection between grief and illness, as found in the phrase, sick with grief. And today, she noted, medical knowledge suggests that our bodies already know what our words have long implied: that grief can, quite literally, sicken.
Sadly, when you're in the midst of grief, it's all too easy to discount the importance of, or ignore these symptoms altogether. But, when you consider the physicality of your grief affects the quality of your grief experience; in the long run, you really can't afford to do so.
Ignoring your physical symptoms of grief will inevitably lengthen your bereavement considerably. Here are some of the most common physical reactions to loss, including the death of a loved one:
- general tiredness and extreme fatigue at times
- random pains and aches, such as headaches, rib, neck or back pain
- an inability to sit still, restlessness
- gastric distress, such as an ulcer, inflammation of the esophagitis, or colitis
- shortness of breath
- heart palpitations
- loss of appetite or it's opposite: comfort eating
- insomnia
- finding it hard to sleep or fear of sleeping
- muscle weakness
- increased blood pressure, risk of heart attack and blood clots
- anxiety attacks
- suppressed immune system
If you're experiencing any of these physical symptoms of grief, it is highly recommended you see a physician for a conversation and a rigorous physical check-up.
What Factors Contribute to Our Grief Experience?
In the excellent Natural News article, Could Grief be Causing Your Chronic Illness?; the author writes of the numerous unique factors within an individual's process of grieving, including his or her level of psychological maturity as well as their level of understanding of the nature and purpose of grief and loss. There are other very important factors affecting the success of a person's bereavement:
- The amount of support given by friends, family and coworkers
- The individual's physical, spiritual and mental health at the time of loss
- The existing cultural and social attitudes about death and grief
When Then, is the Work of Grief?
It's all about cultivating self-awareness; checking-in with your body daily (if not two or three times a day) to assess how it's doing, and writing down the symptoms you're experiencing (with the date/time noted). Look for patterns, and don't ignore them when you see them surface.
Couple this self-awareness with enhanced self-care. Of course, that means tending to your basic physical needs: eating the right food, getting enough sleep, and regular exercise (all of which can be compromised by grief). But it also means taking care of yourself on a practical level; for example, do your best to keep your house clean, your clothes laundered, and your bills paid. Other suggestions can be found in the article How to Manage the Effects of Grief and Stress.
Remember, You'll be Forever Changed
Without doubt, grieving the death of a loved one is a life-changing experience. In the following passage, Ann Lamont, an American novelist, described the lingering effects of grief in physical terms in this passage, quoted widely throughout the Internet:
You will lose someone you can't live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn't seal back up. And you come through. It's like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly ”that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp. (Source: Grief Speaks)
Online Sources: Romm, Cari, Understanding How Grief Weakens the Body, The Atlantic, September 11, 2014Gupta, Sanjay, How Grief Can Make You Sick, Everyday Health, updated 3/10/15Lamm, Maurice, Psychological Symptoms of Grief, Chabad.org, accessed 2016Malerba, Larry, Could Grief be Causing Your Chronic Illness?, Natural News, May 12, 2011
45 Comments
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July 23
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July 23
Reading that 'sick with grief' phrase in The Atlantic article and the list of physical symptoms like muscle weakness really hit me; it's wild how emotional pain translates into actual bodily chaos, kinda like how a simple stick game turns into frantic button-mashing on my phone during coffee breaks.
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July 23
It makes me think about how we track things like i ready scores to measure progress, yet we often lack similar frameworks to monitor these profound physical responses to loss during our daily routines, which is worth pondering, isn't it?
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This is such a crucial read! I remember experiencing intense physical fatigue and even chest pain during a difficult loss. It really highlighted how deeply grief impacts our bodies. Finding healthy outlets, like connecting with friends for a casual game on Basketball Stars, helped me process some of that emotional weight. Taking care of ourselves physically during grief is paramount.
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June 29
This article does an excellent job explaining that grief is not only an emotional experience but can also affect physical health in significant ways. The discussion about recognizing symptoms and maintaining self-care offers practical guidance for anyone navigating loss. During moments when I need a brief distraction, I sometimes play speed stars online, a timing-based running game that's simple and engaging. Thank you for providing such a compassionate and educational article.
business_live
June 29
I found this article both informative and reassuring. Many people don't realize that fatigue, sleep problems, and other physical symptoms can be part of the grieving process, so raising awareness about these experiences is incredibly helpful. The emphasis on self-care and professional medical advice when appropriate is especially important. For a brief mental break, I occasionally play fnf online, a rhythm game that's enjoyable in short sessions. Thank you for publishing such a thoughtful resource.
business_live
June 29
This is a well-written reminder that grief can have profound physical as well as emotional effects. The practical suggestions about self-care, tracking symptoms, and recognizing when to consult a healthcare professional make the article especially helpful. Finding small moments of relaxation can also be valuable during stressful times, and I sometimes enjoy sprunki game, a creative music game that's easy to explore at your own pace. Thank you for sharing such compassionate guidance.
business_live
June 29
I appreciate how this article emphasizes that grief affects the whole person, not just emotions. Explaining the physical symptoms and encouraging self-awareness can help readers better understand what they may be experiencing and remind them that seeking professional support is important when needed. During short breaks, I also enjoy space waves, a rhythm-based running game that offers a light distraction before returning to daily responsibilities. Thank you for this meaningful article.
business_live
June 29
This is a thoughtful and compassionate article that highlights an aspect of grief many people don't fully understand. The connection between emotional loss and physical symptoms is important to recognize, and encouraging readers to seek medical support when needed is valuable advice. Taking care of both mental and physical well-being during bereavement is essential. During quiet moments, I sometimes take a short mental break with slope, a simple reflex-based game that helps me briefly shift my focus. Thank you for sharing such an informative and empathetic piece.
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